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	<title>Arizona Custom Hikes</title>
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		<title>Where the Utes go!!</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/where-the-utes-go/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/where-the-utes-go/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Apr 2012 00:54:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/where-the-utes-go/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We were awakened by the high plains birds chirping outside our windows at the Holiday Inn Express in Cortez, Colorado. I scurried down the hall to retrieve a couple cups of coffee for myself and the love of my life, Lana. Next I took Romeo, our dog out back to relieve himself and chase a [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>We were awakened by the high plains birds chirping outside our windows at the Holiday Inn Express in Cortez, Colorado. I scurried down the hall to retrieve a couple cups of coffee for myself and the love of my life, Lana. Next I took Romeo, our dog out back to relieve himself and chase a couple Prairie dogs that popped up, eeked at him, and dove back down in their burrows as he closed in on them. Then another would pop up, and eek at him from the opposite end of the field and off he&#8217;d go. At one point he paused and looked and looked to me for guidance as if to ask &#8220;where the hell is the mallet for this damn whack-a-mole game?&#8221; I called him to me and we went back inside to checkout, load up the Baddogs S.U.V. and head out for one of my favorite sunrise drives from Cortez, Co. to Telluride, Co. over Lizard Head pass. We headed east towards the sun peeking over the horizon and as we drove the sun dappled through the aspen trees that flanked the creek that riffled over and around the rocks that had cascaded down the flanks of the mountains that hemmed our passage. If you leave early enough you can avoid the huge elephantine R.V.s that can bog you down and impair your enjoyment. Wisps of clouds clung to the mountains on both sides of the road and the ethereal experience was well worth the early rising. As we approached Lizard Head pass which is closed most of the winter you could see deer and elk by the sides of the road cautiously monitoring our passage like a security force of mountainous mutes. As we started our descent from Lizard Head we spotted the twinkling light sparkling on Trout Lake just prior to our turn away from Telluride,Co. towards Montrose,Co. After Montrose,Co. we headed towards Gunnison,Co. and as we left the town of Montrose we began to ascend again towards the Black Canyon national park. This is one of the largest and wildest national parks in the continental United States and it is magnificient.<br />
To enter this part of Colorado you have to climb up and ease down into into narrow canyons which all have rivers brimming with snowmelt parallelling the highways. Sometimes the sun doesn&#8217;t even shine in these narrow high walled canyons until after 10:30 a.m. Anyway we were rolling good towards the Gunnison valley resovoir which you run alongside for awhile before crossing a bridge to the other side. Once we crossed the lake and hit the other side we decided to take a break after this R.V. campsite so we turned down this little peninsula where they have a unisex bathroom by the lakeshore. We park, jump out, let the dog run free and take turns in relieving our bladders. As I exit this spotless facility ever busy Romeo swoops up a Prairie dog and I tell him to release and he does looking mortally wounded by my orders, yet he starts to reload to pursue another. So we call him, saddle up, and off we drive. As we enter Gunnison we stop for groceries at the local Walmart because the prices in Crested Butte, Co. are astronomical compared to our present location. Once again we load up the vehicle with our new supplies and head out for the final leg of this western journey. It&#8217;s approximately 30 miles to Crested Butte and as we approach this beautiful spot you can see the snow topped peaks that herald the heights of this beautiful block canyon. We go to the condo office retrieve the key for our unit and march up and down three flights of stairs to bring in our gear, clothes, and supplies. By now we&#8217;re panting like prizefighters in the fifteenth round because we are doing this at 9500 feet altitude. We quickly establish our command center and go for a hike with no leash because there are no leash laws on the mountain. Hallelujah, we&#8217;re now footloose and fancy free in the wild, wild, west! Actually there is a bar in town called Kocheevers where allegedly Butch Cassidy or the Sundance kid left one of their six shooters when they had to skedaddle because a posse was riding in from Gunnison to arrest and hang em for rustling cattle. So they lit out for Rustler&#8217;s Gulch, another nice hike for another day. The locals are standoffish at first but the accomodations, restaurants, and shops are considerably less than anything in Aspen,Co. which is eighteen miles away as the crow flies. Anyway after the hike we clean up, change, and walk across the ski mountain to eat on the deck of this local restaurant, the Avalanche. We tuck Romeo under the table, consume some tall waters and a wonderful meal. Everything tastes great at 9500&#8242;. As the sun starts to swoop down out of the sky we head back across the mountain when I spy a huge black dog trundling down the hill towards town. Lana tells me to put on my glasses because it&#8217;s no Newfoundland..it&#8217;s a young black bear. I call Romeo to me, slap a leash on him, head for the condo, and a well needed night&#8217;s sleep.<br />
We arise invigorated by 40 degree temperatures and let Romeo out the patio sliding door to view clouds hovering over Crested Butte, the western town with a population of 1600 people with 600 dogs year round. After a brisk hike up the mountain where we encounter no one and Romeo scampers about smelling pee-mail of larger animals he&#8217;s never before had a whiff of we head back to the condo, clean up, and jump into the vehicle to cruise into town and notify the vet, Laura Ramos that we&#8217;ve arrived and are ready to resolve any and all dog problems. Laura and her staff greet us with their laid back laconic manner that seems to be pervasive in this tiny community and I hug each and everyone, scaring each and everyone with my typical big city gregarious nature. After a short visit we head to breakfast at the Paradise Cafe where we power down vittles like starving lumberjacks. At this altitude you can eat anything and never gain a pound which is a nice benefit of vacationing at altitude. The downside is you should limit alcohol consumption and drink lots of water for the first 48 hours you&#8217;re here to help your body acclimatize. After a late breakfast we head back up the mountain for a power nap where we sleep like innocents, rise after an hour, and gear up for another adventure since the sun doesn&#8217;t set until 8:30 p.m. So we head up Slate river road to an unmarked turnoff onto a single dirt track and I hand the driver&#8217;s seat over to Lana as we start four wheeling in earnest up this one lane dirt track and of course we get a flat tire just prior to the crest blocking traffic in both directions with maybe 3 feet of clearance on one side with a 500 feet sheer drop and 3 feet to a dirt wall on the other. Kind, generous folk help us change the tire and we eventually reach the top of the mountain where we pause by a small snowmelt lake to gather ourselves and get the heck out of everyone&#8217;s way. But now the rumor mill is lathered up and everyone knows the ex-Newyorker is in town with his ex-Chicago love ready to resolve all canine behavioral problems and disturb their complacent lifesyle.<br />
After a momentary pause I drove the backway down the mountain and skirted through Gothic, a small hippie enclave where the Rocky Mountain Biological Laboratories operates during the summer season. The roads are impassable during the winter months and I&#8217;m affraid no power lines run out there. Anyway after cautiously meandering through this tiny outpost on the periphery of Mt. Crested Butte we shuddered over dirt roads through towering aspen groves inundated with deer and elk until we gained purchase on a paved road descending through the aforementioned Mt. Crested Butte to finally arrive back at our command center feeling like we&#8217;d been rode hard and put away wet. All in all another adventure that didn&#8217;t go as planned but ended well in the long run. I believe we stayed in that evening, ate homemade sandwiches, took hot showers, and went to bed early. Despite the worrisome task of replacing our tire the next day we once again slept like innocents.<br />
The next day we called Timber Sleds and reserved a couple Polaris ATV&#8217;s, dropped Romeo off at a day kennels and met Greg, the owner of Timbersleds (snowmobile and Atv rentals) at a designated trailhead for an attempt to travel halfway to Aspen, Co. through the wilderness. There is one trail you can four wheel all the way but unfortunately the name of said trail eludes me at the moment but it&#8217;s well marked on all trail maps and it&#8217;s a pip. Lana had never driven an All Terrain Vehicle (ATV) but after she forded her first stream with fear and trepidation and she blasted through it successfully she was raring to go. So off we went! As you climb and level out at various meadows in between woods and rock scree you arrive at new plateaus where all sorts of wildlife forages. We encountered big horned sheep, deer, elk, foxes, and bear. The most amazing part was when we found ourselves crossing boulder strewn hillsides rearranged in last year&#8217;s avalanches and I mean boulders as large as Volkswagens(beetles) but these machines handled these seemingly impassable areas with ease. We made it halfway to Aspen, turned back, and met Greg at the appointed hour, thanked him, and wobbled to our car like bowlegged cowboys after an arduous cattle drive. We arrived at the kennels where Romeo roughhoused with new dog friends all day and he was tired and ecstatic to see us. Believe me the feeling was mutual. There is so much to do here if you like the outdoors that I can hardly scrape the surface of the myriad daily adventures we enjoyed but suffice it to say this is the wildest of the wild west in the continental United States. This used to be the summer encampment for the indigenous indian tribe, the Utes. If you&#8217;ve been romanticizing about the wild west, go online and google Crested Butte,Colorado. The locals are a little standoffish at first but most of their livelihoods depend on tourism so just be persistent, pleasant, and patient because they move at slower paces than most of us big city folk. There is something for everyone here. If you are hungry for comfort food try Slogars where their fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and creamed corn dinners fill you up when you&#8217;re depleted after a day of biking, hiking, fishing, AtVing, or just wandering and perusing the shops in town. If you go up to Kebler pass, the summer route to Aspen you&#8217;ll come upon a turnoff for Lake Irwin where you can fish and hike to your heart&#8217;s content. There are brooks and creeks everywhere and the friendliest dogs in the world live here as well. Crested Butte, Co. personifies the wild west to me in summer where Phoenix, Scottsdale, and Tucson do the same for me in winter. Durango, Co. has a plethora of fine restaurants but it gets hot in July and August. Because of the altitude there is no poison ivy, no poison oak, actually no poison anything but if you&#8217;re near a marshy area such as Peanut lake on the outskirts of C.B. bring mosqiutoe repellent because they&#8217;ll be on you like white on rice. They have free concerts on the mountain during the week and in town and a lot of international bands come through in the summer. If you need advice about where to eat, or hike stop into the Animal Hospital of Crested Butte, say hi to Moe at the front desk, tell her Pierce sent you and she&#8217;ll tell you where to go. If you have a dog and need care set an appointment to see Laura Ramos, she&#8217;s a fine vetinarian and a shining example of the locals. And after you&#8217;re acclimatized go to the Brick (the patio) on Elk street during happy hour and check out the young, fit, athletic, hardy, unique men and women there. Call or e-mail condos on the mountain to get the best accomodations at the best prices. Set up a base camp and make daily forays. You&#8217;ll have the time of your life, I guarrantee it! And when you are ready to see Phoenix, Scottsdale, and Tucson in the months of November through April inclusive give me a call at 602-955-1615 and I&#8217;ll give you all the free advice you&#8217;ll need. I think it&#8217;s a kick how I can communicate with people all over the world through my websites and hopefully Lana and I will run across you when we adventure in your area. Lana and I need to go pass out more T-shirts all over the world and remember&#8230;get endorphinized!!</p>
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		</item>
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		<title>Sexy cardio hike revisited</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/sexy-cardio-hike-revisited/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/sexy-cardio-hike-revisited/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Mar 2012 19:56:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/?p=254</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[                                                                               I just got down from the coattails of  Piestawa (Squaw) peak. Romeo, my dog and I just parked in the lot on the northeast corner of 32nd st. and Lincoln and cranked up the trail from the parking lot to the rim and we did it roundtrip in 50 minutes. The trail is dusty and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>                                                                               I just got down from the coattails of  Piestawa (Squaw) peak. Romeo, my dog and I just parked in the lot on the northeast corner of 32nd st. and Lincoln and cranked up the trail from the parking lot to the rim and we did it roundtrip in 50 minutes. The trail is dusty and twice as wide as it used to be but the people are still as friendly as before. I believe it is the result of endorphins which is why I try to write after working out because it hard to be negative. There were some blooms on a few of the smaller bushes and the Ocotillo plants had vibrant orange tips but the bases of the cactuses looked damn near dead. We need an infusion of moisture soon or it&#8217;s going to be a long dry summer until the monsoons come dancing through the valley. Maybe I&#8217;ll break out my rain dance gear and start chanting, hopping around, and imploring the universe to unleash the tears of renewal. Anyway we hit our stride early and Romeo and I passed several people on the way up and after chatting with and older couple at the rim before we scooted back down. On the way down I decided to outlaw hike for a bit so I let Romeo offleash and worked him with vocal nuances. He responded admirally and he never got more than 30 feet from me and came to me when I called him. Good boy, goodboy, good boy! Straight above us the sky was a vibrant blue but when we arrived at the rim and looked back at the skyline of Phoenix it was a muddied, dirty, browned out blue. Since it was a Monday there was no plethora of scantily clad females but it was worth the trade off because there were fewer trekkers which means fewer interuptions to our momentum. Most of the hikers acknowledged us upon crossing paths with us but it&#8217;s amazing how many had to pluck those sonic earbuds from their heads to do so. I with my devilish sense of humor would mutter things like &#8220;sic em&#8221; and then &#8220;only kiddin&#8221; to see if I could elicit a fear based smile. Sometimes it worked sometimes I got what I call the &#8221; look of love &#8221; which is a frown followed by a disapproving smile. I guess I just like to create reactions rather than have people pass me by like I&#8217;m invisible. Anyway up and down in 50 minutes is pretty good cardio work considering it is 1 mile to the top ergo it is 2 miles round trip. Try it and e-mail me your results if you beat me but don&#8217;t bother if you don&#8217;t. As soon as I arrived back at home I mixed some dried tart cherries with some greek yogurt(natural pain relievers) and sprinkled some raw chia seeds on top mixed it up and ate it like a starving man. Yum, good and filling too. Just prior to this hike I rode my recumbent stationary bike for 60 minutes. Slamming! Like they say in that commercial &#8221; Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go. Please write me with your comments, I really enjoy hearing from all of you. And lastly remember to think globally because we are all in this together united we stand as a mighty force or individually they pick us off  like insignificant little gnats at their leisure. Think positive, get endorphinized, and vaya co dios mi amigos.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Arizona&#8217;s Centennial celebration- my way</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/arizonas-centennial-celebration-my-way/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/arizonas-centennial-celebration-my-way/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 06 Mar 2012 22:08:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/arizonas-centennial-celebration-my-way/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[                                  I was raised in upstate New York where the weather is dismal, gray, and dreary most of the time. The winters [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>                                  I was raised in upstate New York where the weather is dismal, gray, and dreary most of the time. The winters were long, hard, cold, and damp. The summers were storm filled, humid, and their state bird in the summer was a mosquitoe. Keeping a positive attitude is much more difficult without daily sunshine and if you saw the sun 100 days of the year it was a good year. So I ventured west to Colorado first then as the winters and the cold permeated my aging carcass I moved to Phoenix, Az. where if you see the sun less than 300 days of the year it is deemed abnormal and a bad year. Yes, the summers are scorching but quite manageable thanks to air conditioning. Since I wanted to tout Phoenix I thought I&#8217;d highlight 10 businesses or enterprises in Phoenix that are excellent.<br />
                                   The first I&#8217;d like to mention is Arnie&#8217;s health foods on 52nd st and Thomas. I stopped in the other day looking for Chia seeds and the gentleman that waited on me had a ramrod straight physique and was very forthright and helpful while pointing me to this product&#8217;s location. As I purchased the item I casually inquired about his age&#8230;he replied he was 87 years old and as I thanked him for his time I wondered if Whitney Houston would still be alive had she met Arnie and not Bobby Brown.<br />
                                   The second business is an inexpensive restaurant named Baja Loco that has a mesquite grilled chicken and southwest tinged flavors on beef, fish, and other items where you order at the counter, the chips and salsa bar is free, and they bring your entrees to the table upon completion. The manager, Jason is a friendly, family man who will go the extra distance to make sure you completely enjoy your time there. By the way if you&#8217;re looking for a fast Saturday or Sunday omelet or huevos check this place out after 10 a.m. There are no waiting lines to be seated and sports abound on their many t.v. screens. They are located next to Mcdonalds on the northeast corner of 32nd st and Indian school in the Arcadia lite area. I live around the corner and I&#8217;m damn glad I do.<br />
                                   The third business I&#8217;d like to mention is Aaron&#8217;s Barber shop at 3635 E. Indian school, open Tues. thru Sat. 9a.m. to 6 p.m. He had a sign saying haircuts $12.00 on a truck parked in front and since I&#8217;m constantly looking to lower costs of living through these trying times I parked and entered his shop. He arrived in the U.S. years ago from Russia, cut hair in New York city and moved here when he was 47 years old. He has owned several shops but now only owns and operates this one. He is fast, efficient, and gives a good haircut at an outstanding price. This man is personable and truly an American immigrant success story. Check him out, tell him Pierce sent you, and don&#8217;t be bewildered by the dialogue on the T.V. because they are speaking Russian.<br />
                                  The fourth business I&#8217;d like to mention is Bertha&#8217;s cafe in the northwest shopping center at 32nd and Indian school. Bertha is really Beth and she started up at 40th st and Thomas several years ago and began to build up quite a following but was forced to relocate when the previous landlords sold the property. She bit her tongue and gutted it out because she was born to bake. She serves breakfast and lunch and her liittle baked delights are to die for, so check her out.<br />
                                  The fifth business experience I&#8217;d like to recommend is Hi-Health at the Town and Country shopping center just south of Camelback on 20th st. The man to see there is Alex, he helps me all the time and if you are not a Yute[youth] like Joe Pesci says sometimes you need supplements to get your body on track when it&#8217;s been hammered by bad habits, the aging process, or been bombarded by toxins in our environment. Ask for Alex, relay your woes [a brief synopsis], tell him Pierce sent you and see how he helps you. He is caring, incredibly helpful, and knowledeable. Keep in mind these are supplements so they&#8217;re no overnight resolutions but if given time most of what he recommends will empower you and help you on the road to wellness.<br />
                                  The sixth business I&#8217;d like to tout is Hilands.com [cigars] located at 6921 E. Thomas. This place is owned and operated by Scott Hiland and he prides himself on having the lowest prices and most personable service whether on line, on phone, or in person. When I smoke cigars I purchase them at his shop.<br />
                                 The seventh business is Lori&#8217;s Grooming behind Fillibertos in the shopping center on the southwest corner of 32nd and Indian school. This woman can groom a rabid 400 lb. gorilla without breaking a sweat. She works Tuesdays thru Saturdays and has not raised prices in decades. She constantly picks up strays and finds homes for them. She might complain about the economy or the government but she has a heart as big as the Grand Canyon is deep when it comes to rescues. I&#8217;ve taken several dogs to her and she always does an exceptional job at yesterday&#8217;s prices. She definitely personifies the American entreprenuerial spirit and I&#8217;m proud to be a friend. She touts me for training [dog] and I&#8217;d board my dog with her anytime. Lori&#8217;s Pet Grooming, 3031 east Indian School Road #8, [602]955-4209. If you call her or drop by tell her Romeo, my dog says &#8220;hi&#8221;.<br />
                                   Number 8 would have to be &#8221; The Brass Rail &#8221; which is located at 38th st and Thomas. They have the cheapest breakfast in Phoenix. Their special is 2 eggs, hashbrowns, toast, bacon or sausage for 3.50 and you can&#8217;t beat it with a stick. There is nothing like a good, fast, cheap breakfast and if you go there after the hospitals change shifts you might meet the surgeon of your dreams because a lot of them go there to wind down and have breakfast after the midnight to 8 a.m. shift.<br />
                                  Number nine on my tout list are the Phoenix Public Libraries because I&#8217;m an avid reader and they have marvellous setups. Most of the satellite libraries here taht I&#8217;ve been to have the latest books, D.V.D&#8217;s, and C.D&#8217;s available on displays like little Borders or Barnes and Nobles but for free. The librarians are sweet and helpful and once again everything is free. You gotta love America!<br />
                                  The tenth and final business I shall rave about is Zia Records. I&#8217;m a music freak and I like new and old and all different genres so I purchase and trade C.D.&#8217;s, and D.V.D&#8217;s at Zia Records and I even have a Zia card. I can build up points, get special discounts and the personnel are always courteous and helpful. So if you like c.d&#8217;s or dvd&#8217;s go register at Zia&#8217;s a definite Arizona institution. Tell them Pierce sent you and they&#8217;ll look at you like you&#8217;re high which a portion of their clientel is most of the time. I recommend the one in Tempe at University just west of Mill. If you are there on Tuesday morning when they open you run across me because that&#8217;s when the new cd&#8217;s drop and are on sale.<br />
                                  All these businesses personify the American entreprneurial spirit and I&#8217;m proud to endorse them all.<br />
                                  Sincerely,<br />
                                  Pierce H. Russell</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Baubles, bangles, and beads, oh, my!</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/baubles-bangles-and-beads-oh-my/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/baubles-bangles-and-beads-oh-my/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Feb 2012 21:26:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/?p=247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s that time of year again when Tucson hosts the world&#8217;s largest gem and mineral show and this anonymous friend of mine is getting jacked up like she always does. This good friend loves to powershop for her personal and business life and she loves to give excellent gifts to friends, family, and clients. This [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It&#8217;s that time of year again when Tucson hosts the world&#8217;s largest gem and mineral show and this anonymous friend of mine is getting jacked up like she always does. This good friend loves to powershop for her personal and business life and she loves to give excellent gifts to friends, family, and clients. This event is like the superbowl for powershoppers because she gets to view the new trends, geejaws, and purchase them at wholesale prices. She&#8217;s not alone, there are hordes of other women and some men doing the same thing. I like it because I get to view her in her element like watching Michael Jordan or Kobe Bryant in the playoffs, or Tiger Woods at Augusta. there are booths displaying gems and minerals from every corner of the world and I love to see this amazingly diverse collection of cultures represented by these gracious sales ambassadors, converge and barter in peace and harmony. Sometimes I daydream and think that if the world were run like the Tucson gem and mineral show there would be no war or hunger but then I snap out of my momentary reverie and I jarringly awaken to reality.<br />
As we strode through the main doors we were directed by various volunteers to counters manned by other volunteers whose function was to locate our names and businesses, scrutinize our I.D.&#8217;s, help us fill out our paperwork, and issue us our badges that will gain us entree to the many venues. Thanks to computers this process has become incredibly streamlined while the scrutiny has become more intense than ever before. As we were rounding the home stretch in the process I glanced back at the front doors and noticed this short, portly, white bearded gentleman starting the process we&#8217;d just completed and for a moment I thought,&#8221;Hell&#8217;s bells-Santa&#8217;s got to start the process somewhere, sometime so why not the Tucson geejaw show in the beginning of February. And if indeed there is a grain of truth in this observation rather than my vivid imagination running rampant then it would be fair to say Santa is the anti-christ of procrastination. After the check-in process was completed we headed across the street to the first huge tent with hundreds of booths where we hoped to find the new stuff and some of the old favorites we loved. My friend had her track suit and tightly laced running shoes on and once we entered, her pupils dilated, her breathing evened out, and she took off like she heard the opening gunshot start to a marathon. I followed with a smile on my face wondering if I could keep up with her but then again I&#8217;d been training for this event so I shoved any mental self-doubt to the back of my mind&#8217;s closet and strode forward drafting off this blonde dynamo&#8217;s wake. The first place that really captured her attention was a booth that was introducing polished stainless steel bracelets embedded with sparkling cubic zirconium. She asked questions of the rep and eventually picked up her marathon pace with the end result of her negotiations safely tucked away in her sample bag that looked one step up from a homeless Denver Broncos fan&#8217;s luggage, cheap and bright orange yet durable enough to hide her treasures. As we continued on I noticed most of the women were comfortably attired like her but some wore high heels and I knew they were rookies not seasoned pros and thus were doomed for failure. She fingered baubles, beads, chains, charms, and items of various textures while asking pointed questions of the reps. She made some purchases and moved away from other booths after much scrutiny emptyhanded. She was a consumate professional, her emotions were kept in check. This process was all about pace and professionalism and she had no time for melancholy or sentimentality. Like Arsenio Hall would say &#8220;This was bidness&#8221;. It was like watching a shark feed at a new shipwreck, cold and calculating yet brisk and decisive. Her behavior was being mirrored by hundreds of others but by far she was at the forefront of selectivity and pace. The lighting was bright and brilliant to make all the gems and products glisten and sparkle. I needed to use my Oakley wraparound sunglasses from time to time to keep my eyes from hurting. She dauntingly waded through the froth and chaff and I watched chagrinned. I&#8217;d never seen women more focussed and intent in my life and they were everywhere yet they managed to avoid bumping into each other or interrupting each others&#8217; conversations. Their decorum and sense of personal space was unparallelled in any large gathering in any environment I&#8217;d ever shared before. After about two hours her cellphone rang and after a brief conversation we met up with her good friend, Ms. X. Most of the women ran in packs or pairs but I&#8217;d have to say my friend, Ms.Y was a hungry lone wolf loping through this forest of baubles, bangles, and beads in search of the perfect item for client, relative, friend, or foe but relentlessly striding through this teeming throng with a cold,  calculating, detirmined gait. It was like watching a filming of the fittest predators on the animal planet channel. Soon she&#8217;d mined the first venue for all it was worth and we all piled into her car to drive to the next venue, the hollidome. I chatted with Ms. X while Ms. Y recharged, got her gameface on, and shortly there we were. As we entered she immediately hit her stride while Ms.X and I panted in her wake trying to attain our second wind. I noticed a booth from Pakistan and I wondered how long it took them to clear Homeland security and what kind of  hemmoroidal discomfort they were experiencing from the mandatory cavity search.</p>
<p>                                                                                                                                                     The next hot items she discovered were replacement bra straps for evening wear made out of fine chains with various charms. She revelled in this discovery like a Rhino at a mud wallow at the height of a drought. As we completed this venue&#8217;s circuit and entered the next venue I spotted a Latte stand and broke off from the pack to reinvigorate myself and try to achieve a third wind because I was running on fumes. Eventually I caught up with them in time to purchase a clear rubber ball with an eyeball in the center that lit up when bounced that she purchased for a friend&#8217;s dog. Ideally ths fest is for wholesale buyers of major retail outlets for the coming year but it is an awesome experience to see affluent women powershop for friends and family under the guise of bidness. If you&#8217;ve ever been mesmerized by the caribou migration being savaged by wolves or blown away by the Wildebeest migration being decimated by crocodiles crossing rivers this would rank right up there because everything looks genteel and civilized but the inherent danger of all these highly intelligent predators noticing your ambivalence and taking umbrage at your scrutiny could be the last thing you do. These sharks are there to feed and as long as they don&#8217;t notice you you&#8217;re o.k. but if they think you want what they are after then like Mr. T says-&#8221;I pity the fool&#8221;.</p>
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		<title>Destiny&#8217;s Epiphany</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/destinys-epiphany/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/destinys-epiphany/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Jan 2012 22:43:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/destinys-epiphany/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[                         This past weekend my lovely partner, Lana and I rented and watched &#8220;Moneyball&#8221; with Brad Pitt. It was rivetting and as I reflected on it over the rest of the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>                         This past weekend my lovely partner, Lana and I rented and watched &#8220;Moneyball&#8221; with Brad Pitt. It was rivetting and as I reflected on it over the rest of the weekend I became inspired by it. Today I was working out and I had an epiphany and I could hardly wait to put down the barbells, towell off and begin this blog.<br />
                                 Eight years ago I was tired all the time and I went to the V.A. hospital for a physical. I was diagnosed with a life-threatening disease and I opted for chemo-therapy in an attempt to defeat this disease. I fought for 48 weeks, lost 50 pounds, but I did defeat it. Five years ago I was computer illiterate and now I have two websites and I blog prodigiously. I&#8217;ve had over 1,000 hits on Arizonabaddogs.com and over 20,000 hits on Arizonacustomhikes.com. Doors close, windows close, the tide ebbs and flows but open doors and windows abound. If you stay positive and open you can see them and sometimes life beckons you down roads less travelled for a reason. Sometimes your choices are the tried and true which means adapting to traditional means for success in certain industries and you know in your heart it&#8217;s not who you are, so you try and fail. Brad Pitt played Billy Beane, who revolutionized baseball by creating teams from statistics and paying less for players and not defining hie teams around superstars with high salaries. He bucked the norm in baseball and the good old boys club cursed him and waited for him to crash and fail. He anguished, wavered, but stuck to his guns and succeeded. If a house signifies or represents life and we are used to going up the stairs to the front porch and entering via the front door or looking in the front window and suddenly that entry or view is blocked for us, we must find alternatives. Maybe climb a ladder and look through the upstairs&#8217; windows or go around back and climb the fire-escape stairs but we must persist. My last girlfriend told me I couldn&#8217;t blog yet here I am with 21,000 viewers that like to read my entries. John Lennon said &#8220;man plans, God laughs.&#8221;Sometimes rejection and failure beat the snot out of you and you need some respite from life. That&#8217;s O.K. but the next day you need to find a way to re-invigorate yourself. I use endorphines like some people use sugar. I work out every day via a recumbent stationary bike[cardio] and free weights every other day and when I&#8217;m finished my body pulsates with endorphines. The government does not tax me for them, no one can steal them from me, and they lift me up and fill me with hope. Yes when I started it was hard work but any and all success is based on hard work. So stop with the excuses, everybodies got them. Let them go. Pursue your own perfection and believe in yourself. Get endorphinized! Working out is no longer hard work for me but a wonderful habit I look forward to daily. I&#8217;ve been coerced by life&#8217;s circumstances to write so I have and I do it more frequently as time marches on. Find the formula that works for you and pursue it with abandon and tenacity. I might not be Herman Melville, Clive Cussler, or Daniel Webster but I know who they are. I&#8217;m more like Popeye &#8220;I am what I am&#8221;. Everyday I become more who I am, Pierce H. Russell, a man who thinks outside the box, a man who navigates his way around the world by manning the rudder of his own vessel and keeps his eyes on the horizon. Try it, you might like it. Become who you are supposed to be or die and rest in peace knowing you followed your dreams. Open hearts plus open minds open doors but the rub is, how to keep your heart and mind open? My formula depends on exercize and endorphines!! What&#8217;s yours?</p>
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		<title>Innocence Sparkles</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/innocence-sparkles/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/innocence-sparkles/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:12:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/innocence-sparkles/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[                               My partner, Lana, the love of my life pulled into the driveway the other morning with her grandchild, Sparkles strapped into the car seat [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>                               My partner, Lana, the love of my life pulled into the driveway the other morning with her grandchild, Sparkles strapped into the car seat in the back. Her head was listing to the side in sweet slumber while looking ever the diva behind Palm Springs sunglasses that covered half her irish pixie face. As I secured my seatbelt and Lana checked to make sure we had all the necessary gear for an outing to the Phoenix zoo petting zone. I assumed this is where the little ones interacted with live defanged, declawed, and most importantly deballed, damn near dead or almost comatose animals. As we strapped her into her deluxe stroller in the parking lot I could not help but ponder the fact that this child who was not even two years of age had a stroller that cost more than my first car. anyway she awakened with a vengeance like I do some mornings with her bottom lip jutting out ready to rumble but before she could lament her woe Lana sprang into action with positive energy and a massive jolt of love to reel her back from the edge and off we strolled. Before we got to the ticket office we&#8217;d seen a quail and ducks playing follow the leader in the lagoon under the bridge we crossed to enter this children&#8217;s wonderland. After purchasing our senior tickets we followed the signs to the petting zoo and wound around concrete and macadam trails surrounded by moms and their children. The air was filled with shrieks of joy and exultation and the moms looked worn down and resigned to this trudging activity. The moms seemed to lighten up as they approached the children&#8217;s playground in the heart of the petting zoo where they could sit and chat with their friends while they relaxed yet kept a capable eye on their progeny running, scampering, climbing and sliding in this sandy island of childproof safety. We parked the stroller in the barn and cut through a stall to the yard so we could mingle with the ten aged plump goats having siesta time. Sparkles honed in on one laying in an abandoned plastic wading pool on the periphery of the maddening bucolic crowd. The children whirled about like small witches at a coven board meeting yet the goats lolled in the sun like qualluded Hollywood starlets by the pool in Palm Desert. We then strolled on to view the big black horse and I mean big black horse. It had to be a Clydesdale or a cousin of one because it made Shaquille O&#8217;Neal look anorexic. Next, of course came Smokey, the white horse followed by Pedro, the burro. You were forewarned not to touch them because they could bite but the enclosures they were in were impregnable at least to small innocents so all went well. Sparkle clucked at the chickens and the bantam roosters strutting about clucked back their disappointment at the tourist&#8217;s wardrobe. We met a friend of her daughter&#8217;s and I responded cordially with decorum while somewhere deep inside of me the little boy jumped up and down with unrestrained abandon. We strolled some more and discovered ape, elephant, and lion sculptures we could touch and carress. Lana having raised three lovely girls noticed the signs of hunger and fatigue creeping up so we saddled up and headed for the exit so we could go out for lunch and fill Sparkle&#8217;s belly before she crashed for her afternoon nap. Which quite frankly was starting to sound amenable to me as well so after lunch we all napped and had our batteries recharged. Just prior to that as we drove from lunch and Sparkles started to get cranky on her way home to nap I picked up a slightly soiled diaper off the car floor and introduced her to Mr. Poopy. He made her smile and laugh at my prepubescent kindergarten humor and we made it back to the homestead without any flareups. I&#8217;d definitely recommend this simple urban trek to any grandparents or relatives that have the time to spend with little ones. The Phoenix zoo petting zoo is safe and fun for young and old. And lastly to live vicariously through the little ones eyes is invigorating and satiating. Try it, you&#8217;ll like it but you might need a nap when you&#8217;re done.</p>
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		<title></title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/244/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/244/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Jan 2012 21:52:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/244/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[                                        My girlfriend, Lana was off from work for several days. My dogtraining business was slow, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>                                        My girlfriend, Lana was off from work for several days. My dogtraining business was slow, so we decided to play. We started with a 1 mile hike that ascended the coattails of Squaw peak{Piestawa} with our dog, Romeo and the cardio work produced the much needed endorphinized bliss for all of us. Then back home to shower and shave and lay down for a rare and blessed nap. We eventually awakened relaxed, emotionally satiated, physically energized, and decided on a festive pre-holliday dinner at our favorite restaurant in Phoenix. This restaurant&#8217;s motto is &#8220;comida chingona&#8221; which when translated means &#8220;good fucking food&#8221; and the name of the restaurant is &#8220;Barrio Cafe&#8221;. It erupted onto the Phoenix scene a decade ago and it continues to grow it&#8217;s clientelle while other legendary Phoenix institutions close their doors. The location is one and a half blocks south of Thomas on 16th street on the westside of the street and they don&#8217;t take reservations so we opted for the first serving and arrived at 5:15 p.m. Once we were seated we ordered drinks, ice water with a lemon wedge for moi, the designated driver and the house Chardonnay for my impetuous beautiful partner. We ordered the salad with Avocado and Mango slices topped with Bermuda onions with Sesame oil drippings and split it. Sometimes when we are really hungry we have the Guacamole made at your table from scratch which is also fabulous but the homemade chips are carby so we passed on that. Our next course which we once again split is Lana&#8217;s favorite, the Lobster Quesadilla and it&#8217;s 4 little Lobster soft shelled tacos drenched in a heavenly creme sauce that shouts &#8220;Cordon Bleu&#8221;. And lastly, we split the &#8220;filet de titia&#8221; and it knocked my socks off. It is a filet filled with crab and another wonderful creme sauce. We were filled to the brim, satiated beyond belief as we paid the check and proceeded to waddle out the door with cheshire cat grins on our faces. The two women, Sylvanno and Wendy who started this gastronomic delight are friends I&#8217;ve trained dogs for so if you see them say &#8220;hi&#8221; for me. If you are concerned for your safety because of the name or location please consider that you are only eight blocks from Phoenix Country Club. If you&#8217;ve never eaten there, try it, the menu is extensive, the flavors are diverse and unique and the service impeccable. The ambiance is not the Ritz but then again the bill is reasonable or even downright inexpensive for the plethora of taste sensations. Trust me your palate will thank you for the adventure.<br />
P.S The pork slow-cooked for 19 hours is fab, the fish tacos to die for, pretty much everything I&#8217;ve ever consumed there over the last decade has been &#8220;teriffico&#8221;.</p>
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		<title>Sexy local cardio trek</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/sexy-local-cardio-trek/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/sexy-local-cardio-trek/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 09 Dec 2011 20:23:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/?p=241</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Last friday I met a past client/friend with his beautiful alpha male Norwegian Elkhound, Cody for a tuneup. This gentleman is ten years my senior but he has a powerful stride and a will to reach the pinnacle of everything he attempts. His sense of humor is dry like our climate and conversations with him [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Last friday I met a past client/friend with his beautiful alpha male Norwegian Elkhound, Cody for a tuneup. This gentleman is ten years my senior but he has a powerful stride and a will to reach the pinnacle of everything he attempts. His sense of humor is dry like our climate and conversations with him are enlightening to say the least. He&#8217;d called with a problem that when he hikes with his dog, his dog gets aggressive when meeting other dogs on the trail. So we met and I told him and showed him what to do to seize control and eliminate this bad pattern and ergo replace it with a more positve reponse.<br />
We chose the 32nd street and Lincoln hike which is and offshoot of Squaw peak where dogs are allowed. It&#8217;s a wonderful cardio burn for about 1 mile from the parking lot to the rim. I brought my dog, Romeo because he is friends with Cody and as a result wehad a nice four-pack. Myself, Romeo, Cody, and my friend, who I&#8217;ll call Dr. Supermon because he can crank up the hill without any whining and some sharp repartee. It was 8 a.m., the sun was sparkling, the air was crisp, and the ground was shaley but we got in our stride early. There were very few people but the ones we met smiled with an endorphinized bliss created by this cardio climb. We ascended steadily while in my head I heard Led Zeppellins&#8217; &#8220;Stairway to heaven&#8221;. At every dog encounter on the way up I took Cody&#8217;s leash and he took Romeo&#8217;s and we created new positive trends for Dr. Supermon and his dog to practice on the way down and on other hikes. When we got to the rim I watered the dogs and gazed in amazement at the fifth largest city in the U.S.A. lying at our feet. On the way down we laughed and joked and I believe felt blessed to be alive and enjoying another thing the government has not figured how to tax us for. It took about one hour round trip and when we climbed into my vehicle for the short jaunt to his house nearby, he invited me in, gave me a couple cigars and we bid each other adieu. Romeo and I drove home with blissful endorphinized grins on our faces and I got on the recumbent stationary bike and burned more carbs off for another 44 minutes. As I got off the bike I thanked God for another wonderful start to the day during these uncertain economic times. And if you want to try a nice local cardio hike, like they used to tell Mikey&#8221;Try it you might like it.&#8221;</p>
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		<title>Thanksgiving: my favorite American holliday</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/thanksgiving-my-favorite-american-holliday/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/thanksgiving-my-favorite-american-holliday/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Nov 2011 22:30:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/thanksgiving-my-favorite-american-holliday/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[First and foremost I would love to thank God and the universe for providing me with the loveliest, kindest, most generous, supportive, and most positive woman and friend I could ever have dreamed of attaining. She is also the sexiest! I&#8217;d like to thank God and the universe for placing a rescue dog, Romeo in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>First and foremost I would love to thank God and the universe for providing me with the loveliest, kindest, most generous, supportive, and most positive woman and friend I could ever have dreamed of attaining. She is also the sexiest! I&#8217;d like to thank God and the universe for placing a rescue dog, Romeo in our hands one and a half years ago that has turned out to be a loving, obedient, and major protective force in our world. I would love to thank my friends that helped me along the way to becoming a better man who could appreciate what he has. I would like to thank the inept American leadership for shining a light on what&#8217;s important; our immediate loved ones. I would love to thank Mother Nature for providing us Phoenicians with the most beautiful weather in the world. I would like to thank all of you that have responded positvely to my websites; Arizona bad dogs, and Arizona custom hikes via comments, phonecalls, or in person with your words of encouragement. They are all much appreciated! Thanks to the paring down of our material world we can finally focus on the gold in our laps which shines brightly in the eyes of our loved ones as we share our meals. In an era when less is less is more I would say our plates are full.<br />
                                Love and Thanks,<br />
                                Pierce H. Russell Jr.</p>
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		<title>Cabo Bound</title>
		<link>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/cabo-bound/</link>
		<comments>http://arizonacustomhikes.com/cabo-bound/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 27 Oct 2011 23:59:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pierce</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Arizona Custom Hikes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://arizonacustomhikes.com/?p=236</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We left on Monday since the time share ran Monday to Monday or Saturday to Saturday. After the usual rigamarole of chutes and ladders played by Homeland security when venturing out of the country into international waters we touched down in San Jose Del Cabo 10 miles up the peninsula from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.We [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>We left on Monday since the time share ran Monday to Monday or Saturday to Saturday. After the usual rigamarole of chutes and ladders played by Homeland security when venturing out of the country into international waters we touched down in San Jose Del Cabo 10 miles up the peninsula from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.We shambled through the Mexican version of customs to locate and acquire our bags to run the gauntlet of cabdrivers, guides, and assorted local hustlers finally to burst out of the terminal and locate the shuttle to our rental car company. The sun was bright like our desert sun but the breezes were steady and constant. After a short jaunt we arrived and Lana and her mom, our annointed guest entered the building to fill out the paperwork and dicker with the clerks while I was left to guard the baggage. I fired up a short stogie while I lounged in the shade trying to look casual but constantly eyeing everything and everybody around our luggage because stuff can vanish in the blink of an eye in Mexico. My fierce scrutiny kept the rabble at bay and Lana&#8217;s dickering kept the counter help from bumping our daily rate and we were soon loaded up in our economy Ford automobile and headed south to the Sheraton Hacienda Del Mar where we intended to be ensconced for a week of rest and recreation. Once again upon arrival Lana dickered, I patrolled and soon we were situated in our presidential suite on the 3rd floor overlooking the Sea of Cortez. After unpacking we headed to the large Mexican grocery where we loaded up on provisions for the week. After stocking the refrigerator and pantry with essentals and sundries we headed to one of the restaurants on the grounds and had a cocktail and an early dinner. The prices were astronomical as always, the service was slow but the chips and guacamole once they arrived tasted fabulous because the Sea of Cortez gleamed and glistened like a liquid turquoise entity on our immediate horizon. After a couple of fifteen dollar grey burgers we marched Marie down towards the beach and wended our way from pool to pool, jacuzzi to jacuzzi to give her an idea where everything was and help her get a lay of the land. Since she was in a foreign land her fears were overwhelming and she clung to us like a tenacious barnacle on storm battered rocks. Eventually we made it back to our balcony, mixed ourselves cocktails to relax and just enjoyed the view. I&#8217;d like to say the whales swam by in formation sending spumes of water high in the air to welcome us but I&#8217;m not ready for embellishments just yet. Suffice it to say we were tired from the travel and we retired shortly.  The next day we awakened to the sound of &#8220;hola&#8221; which meant the maids were there to spruce up our suite which was by now in total disarray so we got our swmsuits on and headed to the beach for some seashell hunting. I&#8217;d have to say it was hoter than usual because we were here last year just before xmas but the breezes were steady like they were programmed and the waves sparkled and thundered less and less as the tide receded. We shuffled down the pristine white beach awkwardly because of the steep incline of the shore while the waves rolled in to kiss our feet. The shells were sparse, the humidity was on high and soon we encountered rock and coral formations where the best seashells hid but because Marie was tired and unsteady we turned around rather than clamor over and around them in our water shoes like we did the previous year. We stopped by the office to acquire an activities sheet for the week so we could apprise Marie of her options on the way back to our palatial suite. Upon arriving back at our base of operations we dined on sandwiches and Marie and her daughter, Lana scooted to one of the pools while I changed into bike shorts and went to the lavish gym for cardio and weight work. The equipment was first class and after an hour I went back to the room for a siesta donning my Mexican personae. After an hour&#8217;s glorious nap they returned, we showered, shaved, and prepared our evening meal, had a couple cocktails and set out for our evening stroll. The sun was setting and I noticed movement in the plants and shrubbery which I eventually discerned were large iguanas and iguana like lizards anywhere from two and a half to three feet in length, 4 to 6 inches in diameter, and in an array of colors from camoflage green to black and white. These primordial creatures ran and hid when we appeared thank the lord because they looked large enough to swallow small puppies of which there were none. The sunset was glorious and our guest had some activities picked out for the next day; Mexican bingo where you can win some free drinks and a spanish class which would prepare her to assume the role of our own personal interpreter and linguist. After a couple more drinks on our balcony we soon retired for another peaceful night&#8217;s sleep. The next day we were awakened by &#8220;hola&#8221; again as our maid du jour arrived to whisk our suite into spic and span shape to ensure their tips for the week. We dressed and headed to &#8220;the office&#8221;, a restaurant and bar on the beach overlooking the harbor where these massive cruise ships idled after slipping in during the wee hours of the night. After a wonderfull breakfast Lana escorted us to this glass- bottomed skiff that she had secured so we could motor out to land&#8217;s end where the Pacific ocean met up with the Sea of Cortez. We marvelled at the many colored fish and clapped ecstatically at the fat seals on the rocks. The waverunners were skittering across the bay, the parasilors were hovering behind their appointed boats being drug on the end of long extend-a-leashes and we eventually made it back to the beach, picked up our rental car and headed back to our suite for a dual siesta while Marie went to her spanish class. After a short nap, a little afternoon delight, and brief respite from our dark shadow Lana headed to the pool for a swim and I  sauntered with a swagger to the workout  facilities so I could consume more cocktails and more carb-laden meals without becoming &#8220;el gordito&#8221;. So to reiterate breakfast or brunch at &#8220;the Office&#8221; in town is a must and worth every shekel as well as a ride on the glass bottomed boats but remember to tip everyone after everything unless you want flyers with your cheap-ass picture passed out to the muggers. The next day was more of the same at the resort with a scheduled meal at &#8220;Romeo&amp;Juliet&#8217;s&#8221; set for that evening. Where Marie and Lana had pizza while I opted for pasta and it was good not great but eating in a beautiful open courtyard open to the night sky with a plethora of stars and that luscious steady breeze was great. Afterwards we walked the beach at the resort, skirting the waves rushing in, we soon relaxed and became hypmotized and shortly thereafter a huge wave slammed into us, driving Lana to her knees, Marie to her belly, and made me flex my legs and wriggle my toes deeper into the sand until it withdrew. Lana was fifteen feet from me and seemed ready to rise as this monster receded when I noticed Marie being drug back down the beach with the &#8220;Undertoad&#8221; firmly in grasp of her ankles and as she swept by me I tossed this expensive wonderful cigar away, swivelled, lunged, planted my left foot and scruffed Marie as she was being sucked out to sea right past me. I prayed the material of her blouse was quality because I had a firm grip with my left hand and if it didn&#8217;t tear all would be fine. I was still bemoaning the sacrifice of that fine cigar as I tried to lift her as the wave slithered back to sea. I knew time was of the essence because chances are another wave was due shortly. So I started slogging up the beach dragging Marie, who was still dead weight, imploring her in an adrenaline laced voice to &#8220;Get Up&#8221; before the next wave enveloped us. Unfortunately she could do nothing but gawp like a beached whale as the next wave enveloped us so I braced myself once again. Eventually Lana scrambled over to help along with this fine Mexican salesman who dropped his wares and rushed to our aid and between the three of us were able to get Marie back on her feet. We were soaked, adrenaline fueled, and headed back to our suite walking on higher ground staggering like shipwreck survivors but exhilarated to be alive. The nightcaps tasted like nectars of the gods as we retired to our &#8220;el banos&#8221; to try and flush the fifty extra lbs.of sand that had taken up residence in every crack and crevice of our bodies. That night we slept like exhausted adventurers that had bit off more than they could chew but survived thanks to the grace of god and their personal tenacity. The next day when I worked out on the weight machines and rode the bike after breakfast my left hand and wrist throbbed from the previous night&#8217;s exertion bu I suppose &#8220;no pain, no gain&#8221; was applicable and marie graciously dug in her purse to produce 2 aleve that helped compensate for the athritic pain. I swam at the pool, relaxed, and took it easy because we had plans for an A.T.V. sunset ride on the Pacific coast 10 miles north of Cabo san Lucas. We were picked up at the main sales office at 5:30 for our dirt road ride to the A.T.V. launching area. Lana and Marie rode double and I rode single. The machines were less than adequate because you had to shift witout any clutch but the weater and beach were gorgeous but we had to curtail our activities early because Marie was not a happy camper. Since we arrived back early we hitched a ride with a local rancher, Orlando and his young helper, Eduardo and we rode in the back of his duellie truck to Cabo San Lucas where we met the Mercedes bus that took us back to the resort. Definitely a thumbs down on the clutchless A.T.V.&#8217;s. I much prefer the automatic ones I&#8217;ve used in Colorado and if I did it again I would find those or skip it all together. We awakened Saturday, worked out, and idylled by the pool because that night we had reservations at Edith&#8217;s at 7:30 p.m. which is the &#8221; to die for restaurant&#8221; in Cabo San Lucas. When you arrive the valet whisks your car away and you enter the foyer you are treated like royalty as your escorted to your table in this intimate outdoor courtyard open to the stars and the service and food is impeccable. Expensive but well worth it. Lana and I had the surf and turf [split it] and we also shared the Caesar salad that is prepared at tableside. This Caesar salad is the best I&#8217;ve ever had anywhere. Lana claims they use anchvies netted that morning and they swim around in the dressing and our released back into the bay the following morning. Her logic is that this makes for happy anchovies thus happy dressing ergo the happiest Caesar salad in the world. The meat is flown in from the U.S.A. because butchers in Mexico cut meat differently. The entire evening was enchanting or maybe our brush with mortality two nights hence made things taste and smell better than ever. The stars seemed closer and they twinkled brighter like God was winking at us. The next day we packed, organized, relaxed and got ready for our flight back Monday but this is one trip to Cabo San Lucas I&#8217;ll never forget. So to sum up I recommend &#8220;the Office&#8221; for breakfast or brunch and &#8220;Edith&#8217;s&#8221; for dinner but make reservations as early as you can. I know some people that e-mail or fax reservations at least a month in advance especially if they are going in the season, November thru February. And lastly be wary of walks on the beach when the tide is in or coming in because the shore is steep, the waves unpredictable and the Undertoad is a relentless bastard when he has your ankles in his meaty paws.</p>
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